I’ve been having…
an existential crisis for quite some time now, Lol, trying to figure out where I fit in at this time of my life.
I suspect the key to life is super simple and we make it super difficult. And I think this is because we live in our minds first and then our thoughts determine how we move in the physical world as opposed to living in the world and processing it with our minds clearly and concisely.
We humans muddy everything up with our “what ifs” with our “shoulda woulda couldas” and with our “I’ve been wronged” mindsets.
We hold on to everything and let go of things only when someone or something has let go of us.
It’s so hard to walk the paths that we want to without taking a lot of unnecessary supplies with us.
Who is she talking to?
Of course, I am speaking about myself. But I know, considering that humans are human, that a million other people have and are stepping on that same path as me.
Every day is like a dessert dump of the past, the future, and all the things that are going on in each present moment that either re-live the past or ignore the future. Or ignore the past and hold on to the future so tightly that you forget the present.
I sometimes let my past steer my present like an out-of-control rudder. And in doing so my future seems to be very far off in the distance.
The future is only a moment away. Not some world filled with hover cars and silver jumpsuits.
And the past is a record of the multitude of chances given to us to keep trying, changing, growing, and learning (It must be said that the past is also only a moment away)
Age is a privilege
We are all getting older, which is not the problem. The problem is aging. My question is why do we look at these changes as something devastating to have to live with?
Yes, there are physical limitations that we experience when we get older. However, most limits are all in our head. We preach, “It’s all downhill from here,” and we practice limiting ourselves in our daily lives.
I know someone who doesn’t garden because everything hurts. I’ve tried to point out that the pain comes from exercising unused muscles, and if they kept at it the aches and pains would go away or at least lessen. Either way they would still experience the satisfaction and joy that comes from working in your yard.
On the flip side of that a past neighbor of mine, well into her seventies, never let her age decide what she could or couldn’t do.
I once saw her using a machine to refresh her artificial grass. This was ten or fifteen years ago. I know the machines are similar to a lawn mower in size now, but then, this machine was almost as tall as her and she was around five feet ten inches tall!
She handled it like a boss! I told her, “Charlene, I wanna be you when I grow up.”
If you’re not up in years, you died young.
Age is a privilege.
Never too late?
We’ve all heard that it’s never too late. Yet, in this social climate, older people are put into an unsavory category. We are not allowed to grow with the times. Expected to stay in our generation. Told to stop “acting young,” just because we are no longer physically young.
It’s hard not to feel dismissed and discarded. And if you’re one of the few who can still be yourself amid not only physical changes but the social ones as well, you’re an anomaly for sure.
Not to mention brave.
I’m in a weird place right now where I can see what was when I look at what is and that includes myself. Not only my physical appearance has changed. Everything has changed: the topography of where I grew up and the town that I have lived in for twenty years, my family, the way the world works.
It’s funny how we look at those around us and think everybody is growing up, getting older, aging, without seeing ourselves in that observation. I asked my Mother how it feels to be eighty-one years old, and she responded, “I still feel like a young girl inside.”
There is only one alternative to not aging.
It might be too late to join the army or make it to the Olympics. It might be too late to get hired at certain companies for certain jobs. It’s never too late to be yourself.
I Was Here
I recently mentioned to my daughter that I am more than half a century old. Doing so, I realized, was limiting my ability to plan and dream.
Tomorrow is promised to no one. That does not mean that you should stop working on the quality of your life.
Physically, I push myself and although I need to modify some exercises I still workout every other day. I’m always trying to learn something new or improve myself in some small way.
Whether you leave this world tomorrow or thirty years from now, it is you that will do the living. Learn who you are, reassessing that every now and then, because you will learn and grow, and then be you.
We are all trying to build something positive that will say, “I was here,” long after we’re gone.
That something doesn’t have to be a business or riches. It could be an attitude or a way of living.
Follow your heart.
Yesterday, Today, and Tomorrow
So, in the meantime how about providing your number if someone asks without following it with examples of how tired you are or pointing out how old you look or with all the things you feel you can no longer do.
Yesterday was once today. Make it a good one.
Tomorrow is based on today’s point of view, don’t make it about regrets and unrealized dreams.
Today is your chance to make those changes, take those steps, improve, learn, keep growing no matter how old you are.
Life is…now.
“Take care of each moment and you take care of all time.”
Buddha
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